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Singles

He says
The world is flat
And the pictures are counterfeit

He says
NASA lies ‘cause
It’s making bank from Federal mint

He’s got evidence and common sense
I ain’t gonna lie

He’s got photographs he’s lots of laughs
Hope we don’t all die

It’s
Psycho
Logical logical

Psycho logical
Psycho logical

He says
Illuminati
Runs everything from here to Brazil

He says
No one says a thing
They got that eye on the dollar bill

He’s got evidence and common sense
I ain’t gonna lie

He’s got photographs he’s lots of laughs
Hope we don’t all die

It’s
Psycho
Logical logical

Psycho logical
Psycho logical

We’ve seen it a thousand times
Seems right to go along
There’s always a good reason
For doing something wrong

He says
That Covid was made
By Chinese doctors in a bat

He says
The virus kills you
If you are a democrat.

He says
Vaccine don’t work
and it will turn your face flat

He says
Vaccine’s a chip
so Bill Gates will know where you’re at

He’s got evidence and common sense
I ain’t gonna lie

It’s
Psycho
Logical logical

Psycho logical
Psycho logical

It’s
Psycho
Logical logical

Psycho logical
Psycho logical

12 Witches

In the hill country of Texas – in San Saba and Lampasas counties – local legend tells of a coven of witches, called The 99. They say these witches have plagued their crops, their cattle, and their homes, since the early 1900s. Devil worship and strange rituals are being performed deep in the heart of Texas. And those rumors persist to this day.
And as happens – some damn fool made a song about it.

Heard about some ladies
They live not far away
They do strange things late at night
it sure looks like foul play

I snuck up and I watched them as
They danced around the flames
I saw those girls and I can say
That I know all their names

There’s Phoebe and there’s Rosie and there’s Suzy and there’s Jane.
It’s Katie and it’s Wanda and don’t think that I’m insane.
It’s Effie and it’s Mabel and it’s Biddie Tina too
There’s Mavis and Mercedes and I don’t know what to do.

Twelve witches coven
and they don’t like what they see
Twelve witches coven
and they’re coming after me
Twelve witches coven
thank God not ninety nine
Twelve witches coven
and I’m running outta time

I know all those ladies
They don’t live far away
I saw their faces clearly and
I think it’s my doomsday

All twelve of them together
I watched them dance around
They saw me and I ran for it
And now I’m going down

There’s Phoebe and there’s Rosie and there’s Suzy and there’s Jane.
It’s Katie and it’s Wanda and don’t think that I’m insane.
It’s Effie and it’s Mabel and it’s Biddie Tina too
There’s Mavis and Mercedes and I don’t know what to do.

Twelve witches coven
and they don’t like what they see
Twelve witches coven
and they’re coming after me
Twelve witches coven
thank God not ninety nine
Twelve witches coven
and I’m running outta time

There’s Phoebe
There’s Rosie
Suzy
Jane
Katie
Wanda
Effie
Mabel
Biddie
Tina
Mavis
Mercedes

There’s Phoebe and there’s Rosie and there’s Suzy and there’s Jane.
It’s Katie and it’s Wanda and don’t think that I’m insane.
It’s Effie and it’s Mabel and it’s Biddie Tina too
There’s Mavis and Mercedes and I don’t know what to do.

Twelve witches coven
and they don’t like what they see
Twelve witches coven
and they’re coming after me
Twelve witches coven
and thank God not ninety nine
Twelve witches coven
and I’m running outta time

Twelve witches
Twelve witches
and I’m running outta time

Twelve witches
Twelve witches
I’m running outta time

Twelve witches coven!

Poppy Seed Bread

 

Wanna be wanna be
Wanna be wanna be

Wanna be a chieftan
Wanna be on C-span
Wanna be a Greenspan
Wanna go to Sudan

Wanna be a chieftan!
Wanna be a chieftan!

Not good enough
As I am
I’m a cream puff
Buncha spam

Wanna be wanna be

Wanna be a Muscle Man
Wanna crush a beer can
Wanna fitness work plan
Wanna nice sun tan

Wanna be a Muscle Man

Wanna be wanna be
Wanna be wanna be
Wanna be wanna be
Wanna be wanna be
Wanna be better now

Wanna be fitness bro
Wanna have lotsa dough
Wanna be in the know now.

Wanna be in the know now.
Wanna have lotsa dough

Not good enough
As I am
I’m a cream puff
Buncha spam

Wanna be a rich man
Wanna fancy divan
Wanna catamaran
Wanna go to Japan

Wanna be a rich man
Wanna be a rich man

Wanna be wanna be
Wanna be wanna be
Wanna be better now

Wanna be fitness bro
Wanna have lotsa dough
Wanna be in the know now.

Not good enough
As I am
I’m a cream puff
Buncha spam

I’m a cream puff

Wanna be a smart man
Wanna clean brain scan
Wanna make the game plan
Wanna Sony Walkman

Wanna be a smart man
Wanna be a smart man

Wanna be wanna be


She’s a pretty mean
She don’t keep it clean
Sulks the night away
Even Saturday
I’m not too obscene

Sayonara
c’est la vie
Say lah de dah
Say toodle oo
Say adios
Say au revior
See you later alligator

She’s theatrical
She’s tyrannical
I don’t clown around
I’m the stomping ground
All climatical

Sayonara
c’est la vie
Say la de da
Say toodle oo

She’s the drama queen
She made quite a scene
Busted the TV
Had too much chablis
She broke all routine

Say la de da
Say toodle oo
Say adios
Say au revior

She has lots to say
She don’t get her way
Hurts to see her go
Why I don’t know
I’ll miss her cuisine

Sayonara
c’est la vie
Say la de da
Say toodle oo
Say adios
Say au revior
Say after a while you crocodile

She’s a pretty mean
She’s a pretty mean


On my way to the liquor store
Gonna pick up a bottle or two
On my way to the liquor store
Gonna get a cold microbrew

On my way to the liquor store
Gonna get baby momma some wine
On my way to the liquor store
And it better be top of the line

On my way to the liquor store
Rockin’ my fedora hat
On my way to the liquor store
Lookin’ all aristocrat

On my way to the liquor store
Strutting in my shiny shoes
On my way to the liquor store
Got not plans to abuse

On my way to the liquor store
Know for just what to seek
On my way to the liquor store
Been that kind of a week.


It’s a Christmas song
Please sing along
To a Christmas song
Can’t sing it wrong

Just another Christmas
Just another Christmas
its
Just another Christmas
song

Put down the yule log
That’s enough eggnog
Just
Try not to get it wrong

It’s a Christmas card
like that movie Die Hard
Got a Christmas card
You can disregard

Just another Christmas
Just another Christmas
its
Just another Christmas
song

Got my ugly sweater
And my Santa letter
I’ll
Try not to get it wrong

Ain’t got no snow
but I
Got the mistletoe
Ain’t got no snow
but I
Got the house aglow

It’s a Christmas song
Won’t you sing along
With a Christmas song
shouldn’t last too long

Just another Christmas
Just another Christmas
its
Just another Christmas
song

Got Rudolph and Prancer
And nutcracker dancer
I’ll
Try not to get it wrong

Just another Christmas
Just another Christmas
its
Just another Christmas
song

Would ya now would ya now
Would ya now would ya now
Would ya now
sing a long?

It’s a Christmas song
Please sing along
To a Christmas song
Can’t sing it wrong

It’s a Christmas song
Won’t you sing along
With a Christmas song
shouldn’t last too long


Don’t like this
And I don’t like that
And I don’t like a dirty habitat
Don’t like glue
Nor the stomach flu
No I don’t like that at all

Don’t like that
Don’t like that

Don’t like June
And I don’t like Dan
And I don’t want a new installment plan
Don’t like junk
Nor the smell of skunk
No I don’t like that at all

Don’t like Jack
And I don’t like Jill
And I don’t know the capital of Brazil
Don’t like trash nor another rehash
No I don’t like that at all

Don’t like that
Don’t like that

Don’t like that
And I don’t like that
And I don’t like that
And I don’t like that
And I don’t like that
And I don’t like that
And I don’t like that at all

Don’t like squash
And I will not mosh
And I don’t wear a dirty mackintosh
Don’t say gosh
Nor like backwash
No I don’t like that at all

Don’t like peas
Or losing my keys
And I don’t like your spilled antifreeze
Don’t like fleas
Nor cottage cheese
No I don’t like that at all

Don’t like that
Don’t like that

Used to not be so surly
Used to not be this way
But since I’ve got
The pain I’ve got
I can only say –

Hate a gnat
Don’t wear a tin hat
And I don’t like going to the laundry mat
Don’t want fat
Or another black cat
No I don’t like that at all

Really really really really
Really really really really
Really really really really
Really really really really
Really really really really
Really really really really
Don’t like that at all